Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Chapter Two: "How to be a Cool Dad (or Mom)"

Hook your kids up. Arm them with the stupidest knowledge. What is the stupidest knowledge? That's up to you. Here is an example:

Expose your children to insufferable amounts of pop music from your generation. While your kids are young, their tender minds will soak up the lyrics to "Material Girl" and "What I Like About You" like a thirsty sponge. With the way the recording industry and Hollywood are remaking EVERYTHING these days, this information is sure to come in handy in the future.

Throw a bunch of songs into their heads and watch the connections flow back to you. After the 300th time of singing "Puttin' on the Ritz" with my daughter, a funny thing happened. I'd sing the verse and she would respond with the refain. The call and response built to such a fevered pitch, that at one point she shouted in a monotonic growl, "Puttin' on the Ritz!"

She laughed. Then she said,"Wouldn't that be funny if a monster sang that part?" I had to explain to her that there was a movie where Frankenstien's monster (one of her favorites) actually does sing that. She's been bugging me to get Mel Brook's "Young Frankentstien" ever since. SOOOOOPAAAAAH DOOOOOPAAAAHHH!

...wait until she get's a load of Fred Astaire.

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Blogger njCYNical said...

You don't OWN Young Frankenstein?????


Abby Somebody

9:33 PM  
Blogger Galoot said...

You can borrow our copy dude! The kiddoes and me watched it last winter when visiting my folks in Illinoise. They aren't any worser for the wearer.

5:07 AM  
Blogger Stinkypaw said...

Isn't it great to be able to mess with a young mind like that?! Oh the joy of parenting...

9:08 AM  
Blogger PreppyGirl said...

PUTTIN' ON THE RIIIIIIITZ! Peter Boyle... hysterical.

6:34 PM  
Blogger Mr. Social said...

And the cool thing was watching her put together the connection while watching Scooby-Doo Monsters Unleashed, the Sequel. Old Man Wickles aka the Black Knight, played by Peter Boyle got spotted. Now I'm the one who is creating a monster... It's ALIVE... ALIVE!

8:58 AM  

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