Tuesday, September 20, 2005

The Air is Crispy...

Fall is here and without further delay we must all prepare for the inevitablility of the coming snow. That is why I have decided to insulate my body this winter.

I have made a pair of pants out of Owens-Corning® FiberGlass Insulation. They are a bit itchy, but boy, are they toasty! I figure if I am able to scratch myself with a bent coat hanger when and where needed, I should be able to endure the scratchiness and continue to wear them into at least February.

I found a fleece shirt at the local Old Navy® that I have modified to help me maintain a constant body temperature in the cold months to come. I have stuffed the sleeves with 6 cans GreatStuff® to retard any arm drafts. I have also caulked the sleeve cuffs to my wrists to create an air-tight seal. The body of the shirt has been vinyl-sided with an attactive faux clapboard.

My socks have been wired with heating coil which I run on a portable generator. My gloves are heated by a methane boiler I've built in an old fanny pack.

I have yet to find a hat and boots, but I know this week there is a sale on ducttape at the HomeDepot®


Blogger PreppyGirl said...

You should really look into some compensation for all that ad placement.

Sounds itchy but warm. Good luck ya freak.

9:25 AM  
Blogger jen said...

Let me know how your outfit goes. It was 27 degress on the thermometer at Red Robin this morning. I'm sick of this cold and winter hasn't even really begun yet.

11:21 AM  
Blogger princess slea said...

I was not slamming your props. It was a genuine compliment.

7:33 PM  
Blogger Scarlett O'Hara said...

frickin hilarious dude!!!

5:02 PM  

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