Should I Stay or...
"So you've got to let me know..."
No one is going to do it for you. The Clash had it wrong. When deciding to stay or go, the final say is yours alone.
I have boiled it down to a single question. Here's the decision-making method.
Suppose you are married to someone and the two of you have a child together. Suppose you have really tried to make it work. Suppose you have had enough. Suppose you are ready to walk away but you just don't know whether you should stay or not. Here's the final way to decide...
Imagine your child years from now, grown up and in the same relationship situation. Imagine your kid with a spouse just like yours. Imagine your kid comes to you for advice. Should your child stay or go in that situation?
Take your answer to that question, and use it for yourself.
Everyone wants better for their child. Wanting better for yourself makes some people feel selfish. It really isn't. Want better.
Stop passing on the perception that dysfunction is status quo.
No one is going to do it for you. The Clash had it wrong. When deciding to stay or go, the final say is yours alone.
I have boiled it down to a single question. Here's the decision-making method.
Suppose you are married to someone and the two of you have a child together. Suppose you have really tried to make it work. Suppose you have had enough. Suppose you are ready to walk away but you just don't know whether you should stay or not. Here's the final way to decide...
Imagine your child years from now, grown up and in the same relationship situation. Imagine your kid with a spouse just like yours. Imagine your kid comes to you for advice. Should your child stay or go in that situation?
Take your answer to that question, and use it for yourself.
Everyone wants better for their child. Wanting better for yourself makes some people feel selfish. It really isn't. Want better.
Stop passing on the perception that dysfunction is status quo.
2 Comments:
I can't speak on this from personal experience, but I think Jesse in "Before Sunrise" had an interesting take on it.
Too many people don't want to make the decision because of their fears, which is sad. It is so much easier to blame others than to own up to your responsibilities. It's not selfish to want to be happy and well, I see it as a sign of well-being/balance.
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