Thursday, June 01, 2006

What the "L" is your Problem?

Preppygirl has bestowed upon me the letter "L" for my blog today. The following post will be one of those "I don't know what to blog about" exercises. Apologies to those who appreciate really content...

Write ten words beginning with that letter in your journal, including an explanation of what the word means to you and why, and then pass out letters to those who want to play along.

L is for Larry: Larry was a bleachy-haired mohawk kid I met in South Florida. Also known as the "tree-trimmin' asshole." This nickname had nothing to do with Christmas or the human anus. Larry was a landscaper (another "L" word).

L is for Laverne: Shirley this needs no explaination.

L is for Lucy: Living as an artist here in Jamestown, NY, it was almost inevitable that I would eventually find Lucy, or that she would find me. I have completed 3 large-scale outdoor murals of Lucille Ball in the downtown area with the help of my dad, my wife, and me brudder-in-law. A fourth is due to go up this summer.

L is for Logo: Yeah! Part of my job is to create and design logos. There are some truly bad ones out there. Good logo design is very Zen-like. Though it is difficult to adequately describe what a great logo is, it is very easy to tell you what a horrible one is and why. Not here though... not now.

L is for Lime: My wife makes me stick these in her Corona's. The process is not for the slender-digited. Forcing the wedge of green citrus through the circular glass mouth and into the cool golden liquid is only half of the process. To distribute the limey goodness throughout the beverage, you must plug the bottle opening with your thumb and invert the vessel until the fruit swims up to the base of the container. Turning the bottle back upright and breaking the seal your thumb has created is the trickiest part. You may have to suck some suds or soak your duds.

L is for Living in America. James Brown performed this song in concert when I saw him replacing some of the city lyrics at the end of the song with "Buffalo...Niagara Falls!" It took the audience five or six times before they realized what he was saying. James Brown was awesome.

L is for Lenny my favorite brother. He gave me his old cell phone.

L is for Lauderdale. I spent more than a few years down south. Met a ton of cool people then got the hell out of Florida. One of myu favorite tricks was to transpose the vowels when addressing correspondence to that locale. Despite writing "Fart Louderdale" on many a letter, they always seemed to get there.

L is for lapdance. I am an excellent lapdancer. Ask the ladies in Lauderdale.

And finally, L is for lips. I am fascinated by lips. They are great weapons.