Bang and Blame
Life is unfulfilling.
Why is that? What is it? It's you. It's me (actually).
I've blogged about the artist Bobby Chiu before. He's a Toronto artist whose YouTube videos I watch a lot. It's the narration that kills me everytime. Bobby Chiu is an amazing artist, but it's his attitude and philosophy that I envy most.
I know that I have blogged about my job before. I have been doing a lot of very heavy thinking about it lately. I have finally decided that I do not belong here. This job is what it is... and it will never get better. I will never get better working here. Bobby Chiu said something in the video I watched last night about creative jobs. It really struck a nerve.
He talked about having a creative job that you dread. He said he would rather be doing something non-creative than be in a situation that made him dislike art. He's right. This job makes me dislike art. I get home at night and want to draw or paint or work on my own art, and I am creatively drained.
I am talented. I have technical skills too. I don't think the management here appreciate what I offer. I want to work for someone I can respect, that respects me. The circumstances which led to my working here are a bit sketchy... but I know now that it is time to go.
The company-owned hotel down the street is having an Art Exhibition this week. As part of an event this Saturday, I will be doing caricature work all day. They also convinced me to hang some of my illustration work in the show. I produce digital illustrations. The head of my department asked why I hadn't hung any real paintings. It rubbed me the wrong way a little. I'm not saying he is a bad guy or anything, but what I do is beyond his ability to understand and appreciate. You can't get mad at that, really.
This company does not demean me. This job does not demean me. I demean myself every day by coming here to work. I am better than this. I deserve the most blame. Every day I come here to work, is one less day of becoming better and happier. I will be putting in my 2 weeks notice, before the end of August.
Why is that? What is it? It's you. It's me (actually).
I've blogged about the artist Bobby Chiu before. He's a Toronto artist whose YouTube videos I watch a lot. It's the narration that kills me everytime. Bobby Chiu is an amazing artist, but it's his attitude and philosophy that I envy most.
I know that I have blogged about my job before. I have been doing a lot of very heavy thinking about it lately. I have finally decided that I do not belong here. This job is what it is... and it will never get better. I will never get better working here. Bobby Chiu said something in the video I watched last night about creative jobs. It really struck a nerve.
He talked about having a creative job that you dread. He said he would rather be doing something non-creative than be in a situation that made him dislike art. He's right. This job makes me dislike art. I get home at night and want to draw or paint or work on my own art, and I am creatively drained.
I am talented. I have technical skills too. I don't think the management here appreciate what I offer. I want to work for someone I can respect, that respects me. The circumstances which led to my working here are a bit sketchy... but I know now that it is time to go.
The company-owned hotel down the street is having an Art Exhibition this week. As part of an event this Saturday, I will be doing caricature work all day. They also convinced me to hang some of my illustration work in the show. I produce digital illustrations. The head of my department asked why I hadn't hung any real paintings. It rubbed me the wrong way a little. I'm not saying he is a bad guy or anything, but what I do is beyond his ability to understand and appreciate. You can't get mad at that, really.
This company does not demean me. This job does not demean me. I demean myself every day by coming here to work. I am better than this. I deserve the most blame. Every day I come here to work, is one less day of becoming better and happier. I will be putting in my 2 weeks notice, before the end of August.
Labels: bobby chiu, job
posted by Mr. Social at
8:06 AM
2 Comments
